Self-injury

Sometimes the feelings we carry become so overwhelming that we can’t keep them in. Sadness, anger, fear, emptiness… all of these can weigh heavily. When no one understands what you’re going through, or when it seems like nothing will get better, the idea of hurting yourself may arise as a way to alleviate feelings and thoughts.

Self-injury can be very scary, and most of us would rather not talk about it. But talking about self-injury doesn’t make people do it more. Instead, it helps to understand the problem and find ways to help those who self-injure.

Self-injury is when someone harms themselves on purpose to deal with strong emotions like deep sadness, big anger, or extreme anxiety. The most common way people self-injure is by cutting or scratching their skin with things like razors, paperclips, or pen caps. People also burn, hit, or bite themselves or pick at their skin and wounds. Self-injury happens more often in girls than boys and usually starts during the teenage years.

While it may seem like a solution at the moment, hurting yourself doesn’t solve what’s going on inside. And if this is happening to you, know that you don’t have to face it alone.

Is self-injury typical?

No.

There isn’t a “normal” way to hurt yourself. But to help, it’s important to understand self-injury.

Why people self-injure:

• To distract from strong emotions.
• To feel something when they feel numb.
• As a hidden way to ask for help.
• To ease emotional pain or show others they are hurting.

Self-injury is not a good way to deal with problems. It might bring temporary relief, but this makes people want to do it again, and the relief isn’t long-lasting. The longer it goes on, the harder it is to stop. Many who self-injure feel ashamed and want to stop but need help. This doesn’t mean weakness; it means the burden is too great to carry alone.

Asking for help is essential. Having someone you trust by your side can make all the difference in finding better ways to cope with your feelings.

There are a lot of people who care about you. Asking for help doesn’t change who you are; it just shows that you’re taking yourself seriously. And that’s very valuable.

When should I be concerned about self-injury?

Self-injury should always be taken seriously. It means someone is hurting deeply. Life can be tough, and it’s normal to feel lost sometimes. But hurting yourself doesn’t fix problems. It might offer temporary comfort, but it causes physical pain and leaves scars. Over time, it can lead to guilt, shame, and self-hate.

If this discomfort lasts a long time, keeps coming back, or makes you want to give up on everything, it’s time to ask for help, especially if you are:

• Hurting yourself in any way, even in ways that seem “light” and superficial.
• Collecting, storing, or hiding sharp objects.
• Visiting websites or social media about self-injury.
• Moving away from friends and family, having difficulty sleeping, eating, studying, or having fun.
• Keeping too many secrets, hiding your feelings, or constantly comparing yourself to others.

If you’re self-injuring, you do not have to be alone. When hurting your body seems like the only way to relieve what you’re feeling inside, it’s because something is crying out for help, and that cry deserves to be heard with care and respect. This isn’t a whim, an exaggeration, or drama. It’s real, and there is help available.

What can I do if I (or a friend) struggle?

If you’re having a hard time and hurting yourself, you do not have to face it alone. It’s important to ask for help sooner rather than later.

Tell a trusted adult. This could be a caregiver, family member, teacher, or someone responsible for you. Let them know what you’re going through. They can help you get the support you need.

Accept the help offered. Sometimes people around you will notice something’s wrong. When they do, they might reach out to you. Even if they do not always do it the right way, take the chance to tell them what’s happening.

Here are some things you can try:

1. Tell a trusted adult: A parent, family member, or someone who cares for you can help you find support.
2. Accept help: If someone notices you’re struggling, let them help.
3. Distract yourself: Watch movies, listen to music, or do activities you enjoy to help divert your attention.
4. Find other relief: Hold an ice cube, take a cold shower, bite a piece of raw pepper, or exercise intensely for five minutes to lessen the intense sensations brought on by emotions.
5. Limit access to tools: Lock up, discard, or freeze anything you use to self-injure.
6. Call a helpline: Reach out when you cannot handle it alone. Many countries have free, confidential support lines available 24/7.
7. Understand your triggers: Notice what makes you want to self-injure and how you feel afterward.

While you’re reaching out for help, try these to stop self-injuring:

• Make a list of reasons to stop.Even though self-injury might bring quick relief, it harms your school life, your friendships, and your feelings about yourself. Think about the life you want for yourself and let that guide you.
• Remember the good things about you.Self-injury often makes you feel down. Try to list your strengths and what makes you special.
• Know you do not deserve punishment.Even if you’ve made mistakes, you deserve kindness and respect.
• Try new activities.Being around others and doing enjoyable things can help you feel better.
• Stay healthy.Exercise, eat well, and do fun things to boost your mood.
• Get help for other mental health issues.If you’re dealing with sadness, anger, or anxiety, look for help so these feelings do not make you want to self-injure more.
• Celebrate your progress.Recognize every effort you make to overcome the urge to self-injure.

You don’t need to have all the answers. Taking care of yourself also means allowing yourself to be taken care of. You are important, even on difficult days.

What kind of professional support can I seek out?

It’s common to feel embarrassed, inadequate, or guilty if you’re self-injuring. But help and guidance are available. Don’t hesitate to talk to a trusted adult for guidance, such as a teacher, a school counselor, or anyone else you feel safe sharing with.

Doctors like pediatricians, general practitioners, or professionals at your nearest Basic Health Unit (UBS)can help if you are concerned about self-injury. They can refer you to other specialists, including mental health professionals.

In a crisis or immediate risk, you can go to a hospital emergency room or call emergency services like SAMU (192).

Public services are also available through the Unified Health System (SUS). You can find support at places like your local Basic Health Unit (UBS), Child and Adolescent Psychosocial Care Centers (CAPS i), and public outpatient clinics.