Social influence

These days, it’s easy to see all kinds of new trends online, especially on social media. Influencers, people with a large social media following, can affect how you think, feel, and even how you see yourself. They might promote certain looks, products, or ways of living that seem cool and exciting.

Sometimes, the stuff we see online isn’t real or sets standards that are impossible to meet. This can mess with our self-esteem and make us question what’s “normal.” That’s why it’s super important to see the difference between what you see online and what is reality.

Nothing you see online is random. Computer programs are designed to learn what you like and then show you more of it, including ads. Some AI programs can even create realistic fake news or videos. As technology gets better, it’s hard for anyone to tell the difference between what is real and what is fake.

When the messages we see are unrealistic or harmful, it can affect our self-esteem, our behavior, or how we see ourselves. As users, it’s important to be able to recognize the difference between online life and real life.

What is typical?

It’s normal to copy what you see others doing on social media. You might be curious or feel inspired. But if you start depending on influencers to tell you how to think or act, it can become a problem.

-Recommended age for social media use. Experts say it is best to wait until you are at least 13 years old to get on social media. In fact, most platforms require you to be 13 to create an account. You may have joined at a different age than your friends, but studies show that using social media before age 13 can lead to more negative experiences.

-Typical behavior involving social media. Many of us follow influencers for fun, to stay up to date, and to feel like we belong. Influencers can be great role models, encouraging you to build good habits and boosting your self-esteem.

Copying an influencer’s style, hobbies, or slang is a normal part of figuring out who you are. It is also completely normal to be excited about products your favorite influencers promote.

When should I be concerned?

Sometimes, being too focused on an influencer can become a problem. If you find yourself feeling one or more of the things listed below, it might be time to reach out for some help:

-You make decisions based only on an influencer’s advice without thinking for yourself

-You speak negatively about yourself or your life

-You change how you eat to match an unrealistic body standard you saw online

-You have a hard time telling the difference between social media and reality

-You feel bad about yourself after using social media

What can I do if I (or a friend) struggle?

If you’re noticing social media is affecting you in a negative way, here are some things you can try:

1.Curate your feed. Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad about yourself. Follow accounts that inspire you, teach you something new, or just make you laugh. You are in control of what you see.

2.Set time limits. Decide how much time you want to spend on social media each day and stick to it. You can use app timers to help. It can also be wise to have a friend or family member who can help hold you accountable.

3.Remind yourself of what is real. Nobody is perfect, and we only see a tiny, edited piece of someone’s life online. It may look like somebody has the perfect life, but a lot of it is staged just for show.

4.Find real-life role models. Look for a role model in your own life—a family member, teacher, or coach. This can help you see the difference between reality and what is online.

5.Check in with your feelings. Pay attention to how you feel when you’re on social media. If you start to feel bad, be self-aware and think about what is making you feel that way. It’s okay to log off.

6.Disconnect. Take time to do things offline. Take a walk, talk to a friend, read a book, or practice a hobby.

Things to keep in mind

-Unrealistic looks. Social media often hides flaws and only shows the best parts of someone’s life. It’s easy to forget that editing tools are used to make this happen and that real life doesn’t look like an online post.

-Fake perfection. Influencers may have entire teams helping them make their posts look easy and perfect.

-Risky trends. Some viral challenges can be dangerous, even if they start as jokes.

-Harmful messages. Some influencers can push extreme ideas about dieting, violence, or how people should act. Other posts can make you compare yourself to others and feel like you need to own certain things to be happy or successful, which isn’t true.

-Bullying. Hateful comments can hurt. Remember that people who post mean things online often wouldn’t be brave enough to say them to your face. It’s also important to think before you post a comment.

-Trained algorithms. Social media is designed to keep you scrolling. The algorithm learns from what you like and comment on and then feeds you similar content. Just because you see a lot of posts about something doesn’t mean it’s true or that everyone else is seeing it.

-The urge to buy. A lot of content now is about buying new products. Remember, you don’t need to buy every trending product. Influencers are often paid by brands to promote these things.

Predators. Some people online may try to take advantage of or harm young people. Be careful about who you talk to and what you share.

-Edited photos. Filters and apps like FaceTune can completely change how people look. This can make others feel insecure about their own appearance.